This week I was again travelling for work, and again it was to a country that is fairly paranoid about safety and security. In hindsight it is easy to laugh about, but as usual, only in hindsight. I call it the G10 procedure, and it went something like this:
For most International flights you can get away with booking in an hour and a half (or maybe even an hour) before the flight, but for this particular country, and especially this particular airline, you need to use every minute of the three hours that they allow for. The process starts with you, the passenger, arriving at the airlines’ specially demarcated check-in area. The check –in area is surrounded with bullet proof glass and there are a number of guards all carrying semi-automatic rifles. Having arrived at the check-in area you are then approached by, what can only be termed, a Profiler. The Profiler’s job is to scrutinize your passport and look for anything that might be considered suspicious. This may be the fact that you are a resident of a country other than the two you are flying between. It could be the brightly coloured stamps of a country that you visited in the past that is not on talking terms with the country you are hoping to visit now. Or maybe it has something to do with the fact that you were born in Polokwane, or worse yet, you have more facial hair than what your passport photo shows. In my case there were multiple reasons for the ‘Profiler’ to get excited. This then results in even more bizarre questions being asked, like “Why did you decide to fly today?” and “Do you have to go on this trip?”. What is the correct answer??
Having decided that I qualified as suspicious, and having had this confirmed by the head Profiler, I was then informed that I would have to proceed to Gate G10, and that I would have to be there one and a half hours before scheduled take-off.
Gate G10. She made it sound so simple. Surely it is the gate after gate G9? No. You see gate G10 is not a real gate. It is a room located below all the other gates and it is not sign posted as “This way to G10”. It is only by asking the heavily armed security guards for directions that you will ever find gate G10. Once you are in G10 the G10 procedure starts. It starts with a Department of Home Affairs type of wait. Take a seat and wait for your number to be called. I was number three in the queue. Once your number is called the process starts all over again. The passport is scrutinized, your hand luggage (and checked in luggage if you are unlucky) is turned inside out and the barrage of questions starts all over again. Having finally decided that I could proceed to the next ‘stage’, I was given a personal escort to the security check. At the security check I was taken straight to the front of the queue where the lady operating the x-ray machine was informed that I was “one of the people from G10”. This got the lady and her colleagues all very excited. They spent the next few minutes double checking that the x-ray machine was working properly (what were they using it for up until now?) and that any other machine that was supposed to make a noise and flash with red lights did as it was supposed to. Great fun, as long as you are not the guy at the front of the queue that has caused all this fuss to be made.
Eventually, after having had my bag scanned, and having done the standard belt and shoe strip, and having gone through the metal detector, and having had the obligatory security pat down (even though the metal detector never actually went off), I was clear to go. Now I could proceed with my trip looking forward to the return trip…
Having spent all this time in the airport, I managed to encounter a few other funny moments:
1) Whilst standing in the check-in queue (the one where you are given your boarding pass in exchange for handing over your suitcase), two girls in front of me decided to unpack their suitcase on to the scale at the check-in desk. Apparently they were 14 pounds over weight and had to “make a plan”. This was all working out fine for them for the first five or so minutes until the check-in clerk realized that her check-in desk was starting to look like a flea market. Needless to say the girls were asked to take their stuff and weigh it somewhere else.
2) On the way back I had bought some small presents for Bron. I had originally intended to send the presents with my checked in baggage. This plan was foiled. The security check (yip, bag gets x-rayed before you even check-in) decided that these presents need to be packaged separately. So these two little gifts, each the size of a fist, would need to be boxed separately. The box that was eventually brought for these two little packages looked like it could be used to ship two pairs of shoes, a drum, half a cow and still have some space left over. And then I am supposed to take the airline seriously when they measure the size of my baggage.
Anyway, tomorrow we are off to the south of Spain for our end of year break. Here’s hoping we don’t encounter another G10 procedure.
Merry Christmas all and we will be back and blogging in January.
Some end of year photos
Celebrating Sinterklaas with some friends (the meal is Stamppot and sausages - a traditional Dutch meal)
Playing a gift swap game at Sinterklaas
The Oliebollen (think sweet vetkoek) seller
A hot oliebollen sprinkled with sugar
Our christmas tree
Some of the festive lights in Rotterdam
The National Architecture Institute (Rotterdam)
Sunset in Tel Aviv
Tel Aviv coastline
Coastal engineering in action: an offshore breakwater and the resulting salient
Ice-skating with Bron's department
Note from the editor:
Despite best intentions I have as yet not put together another blog on life in Rotterdam which I am quite bleak about. As you can see from the above photo's we have been pretty busy these last few weeks with some social activities but also trying to get things finished at work before we go on leave. But watch this space!! There will be more blogging next year and there will definitely be more posts on living in Europe. As Justin said we are off to Spain tomorrow, yay! Looking forward very muchly. Things will probably be quiet on the blog front while we are away but watch out for Marph and stoires from Spain in January =)
Wishing you all a Blessed Christmas and a very Happy New Year!
x
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